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About Kryvyi Rih

My fave part? When they hit that spot—bam!—you’re floatin’, stress gone, like Snoop smokin’ a blunt on a Sunday. Pro tip: coconut oil’s the move, slick and tasty, keeps it real. Once saw a dude slip off the table, buck naked—hilarious, yo! “What’s your name?” I’m cacklin’, echoin’ that movie line, while he’s floppin’ like a fish. Shit’s comedy gold.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this commotion. Turns out, some dude was tryin’ to sell homemade pierogi. I love pierogi, but this guy? He was shoutin’ like he was at a market in Lviv. “Best pierogi in all of Ukraine!” he yells. I’m like, “Dude, chill! You’re in Novhorodka, not a food festival!” But I couldn’t resist. I bought a plate, and wow, they were legit! Best decision ever.

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