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Oh, R2, where you at? I’m ramblin—prostitutes got layers, man! Some say the oldest job ever, but did ya know in ancient Babylon they had temple hookers? Holy sex for the gods—nuts, right? Blows my mind thinkin how long this gig’s been around. Makes me wonder—what’s Candy’s story? Bet she’s got dreams bigger than this crap. Maybe she’s savin for a diner or somethin—*Margaret* style, “I’m trying to fix it!”—but life keeps screwin her over.

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But then, I saw this poor kid crying because his dog didn’t win. I felt for him, man. I mean, it’s just a dog show, but to a kid, it’s like the Olympics. I went over, gave him a pep talk, and told him his dog was a champ in my book. He smiled, and it made my day.

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