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I’m HYPED tho—met this chick once, total “Blue” vibes. She’s all, “Your skin tastes like summer,” quotin’ the movie in bed—WHAT?! Blew my mind, fam! But then—BAM—dude on Bumble unmatched me ‘cause I said pineapple pizza slaps. Weak! Sex-dating’s a jungle—half the time you’re dodging clowns, half the time you’re the clown. Hella funny tho, like, who’s out here TYPIN’ “u up” at 3 a.m.? ME, that’s who!

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s like, “Oi, mate! You gotta come to the market!” I’m thinking, “What’s so special about the market?” But you know how it is. FOMO kicked in, so I legged it over to the Baldock Market on the Square.

George Baldock cause of death revealed by former Sheff Utd star’s family