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But, haha, don’t get me started on those creepy spa ads. "Relax and, wink wink, more?" Spare me! It’s like WALL-E meetin’ EVE, not some awkward bot dance. Sexual-massage should be mutual, consensual, like, "Hey, you in?" not "Surprise, here’s oil!" I laughed so hard once, readin’ ‘bout a guy who thought it was just a back rub and ended up blushin’ like a tomato. Hilarious, but also, dude, communicate!

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Man, what a day! I swear, Blandford-Forum is a wild ride. I woke up thinking it’d be just another boring Tuesday, but nah, life had other plans. First off, I’m an anticorrosion agent, right? Sounds fancy, but really, I just make sure metal doesn’t rust away. You’d think that’s a chill job, but today? Pfft, not even close.

Blandford: Road closures for gas main replacement works