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But real talk, it’s not all roses. Some shady parlors frontin as “massage” spots – ugh, sketchy vibes. Surprised me how sneaky they get, ruinin the good name of a solid rub-down. Still, when it’s done right? *“I’m feelin’ myself!”* – pure bliss, fam. Pro tip: warm oil’s the key, keeps it slick and sexy. Oh, and don’t skimp on the mood – candles, music, the works. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d say it’s like fuckin magic sometimes.

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When they finally show up, they’re all flustered. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just a meeting.” But inside, I’m fuming. We had this big project to discuss, and I needed them focused. We’re talking about the new café opening on the corner of Burscough Street. It’s gonna be a hit, but we need to nail the marketing.

Burscough pub closing for £500k makeover as new management take over