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Oh, and oils – they’re key, yesss! Some use weird stuff, like coconut, ha! Smells edible, but don’t eat it, no! Me nose twitches, mmm, love it! “A world of endless copies,” Kaufman’d say! Copies of pleasure, ooh! Ever tried it, mate? Ya should, ya should! Sneaky treat, better than fish, raw and wriggling!

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just my luck! The lights flicker, and I’m stuck in this metal box with Mr. Backpack. I’m like, “Great, now I’m gonna die in an elevator in Carrickfergus.” But he’s chill, starts cracking jokes about how we’re gonna be famous for being the first elevator operators to get stuck. I’m like, “Yeah, right, I’ll be the guy who got trapped with a dude who can’t pack light.”

Pensioner charged following attempted stabbing in Carrickfergus