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About Bristol

What pisses me off? The hypocrisy, mate. Lords and priests waggin’ their fingers by day, then slinkin’ in at night. Makes me wanna spit. But what gets me happy? The girls—some of ‘em, anyway. Sharp as Valyrian steel, they are. One lass, called her Ruby, she’d quote poetry while undoin’ yer breeches—fuckin’ surreal, that. Surprised me first time, thought, “Seven hells, I’m in love!” Course, I wasn’t—wine’s a cruel mistress.

What you’ll witness in Cullompton will haunt you for the rest of your life

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But then, she surprises me. She pulls out a bag of homemade cookies! “Here, have one,” she says. I’m thinkin’, “Wow, maybe you’re not so bad after all.” I take a bite, and it’s like heaven. “These are amazing!” I tell her. She beams. Maybe I’ll let her complain more often if it comes with cookies.

Active travel routes could attract more funding