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I’m designin this game in my head, right? Escort’s got a backstory—maybe she’s savin up for somethin big, like Jared’s mom tryna hold it together. “I’m gonna be on television!”—she’s dreamin, hustlin, it’s tragic but badass. That’s what she said! Ha! No, seriously, it’s deep—some escorts are artists, swear to God. One chick I read about, she’d sketch clients after—secret portfolio! How dope is that? Total mind-blow.

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I duck into a pub on the corner of Sadler Gate. It’s called The Smithfield, and it’s got that classic vibe. I order a pint, and the bartender’s like, “You look like you’ve been through it!” I’m like, “You have no idea, mate.” We start chattin’, and he tells me about the local music scene. Apparently, there’s an open mic night at The Flowerpot later. I’m thinkin’, “Why not?”

RAMS REVIEW: Stoke City (H)