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About Sheffield

But—motherfucker—it pisses me off, too! She’s got no 401(k), no damn safety net! One bad night, and bam—she’s broke, fucked, finito! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, “Girl, invest that shit!” ‘Cause I’m the planner, right? I’d tell her, “Stash 20%—Roth IRA, bitch!” But nah, she’s livin’ day-to-day, smokin’ cigs, wearin’ heels that scream “fuck you” to the world. Kinda badass, kinda sad—fuckin’ surprises me how they pull it off.

Edgworth Bess, a Prostitute (fl. 1723-24)

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So, I finally get to Dave’s, and he’s got this new piglet. Adorable little thing! I’m all “Aww, look at ya!” But then, it starts squealin’ like it’s auditioning for a horror movie. I’m like, “Chill, mate, it’s just me!” But nah, it’s freakin’ out. Turns out, it saw a cat. A CAT! I’m losin’ it.

Fear of 'vapour explosion' at electric bus depot planned under tower blocks