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Dunno if ya know this, but back in Victorian times, prossies were everywhere, like fleas on a dog – some even got nicknamed “two-penny uprights” cos they’d do it standin’ in alleys for peanuts. Grim as fuck, eh? Gets me proper riled up – society’s always shat on ‘em, yet they’re the ones keepin’ the wheels turnin’ for every randy sod with a quid. Surprised me, honestly, how tough these lasses are – proper survivors, not just slags.

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Then, I decided to take a walk by the River Great Ouse. It’s beautiful there, honestly. I was just chilling, watching the boats go by, when I saw this family having a picnic. They were laughing, and I felt a twinge of jealousy. I mean, who doesn’t want a picnic by the river? But then I remembered my lab work and thought, “Nah, I’ll take enzymes over sandwiches any day.”

Plans progress for national bakery chain looking to open in city