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Oi, mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as hell, “shaken, not stirred.” So, sexual-massage, yeah? Been thinkin’ bout it lately, cos who doesn’t love a good rubdown with a naughty twist? Picture this: dim lights, oil slicker than a villain’s grin, hands sliding like they’re huntin’ for secrets. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*—that tension, y’know? Like when Aldo Raine says, “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business,” but swap Nazis for stress, and I’m all in, baby!

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Finally, I sit down to work. I’m in the zone, right? The wood’s singing to me, and I’m shaping it like a sculptor. But then, the door swings open, and in walks this guy. He’s got a wild look in his eyes, like he just ran a marathon. He’s like, “I need a violin, like, yesterday!” I’m thinking, “Dude, chill. This ain’t a fast-food joint.” But he’s desperate, so I take a breath and say, “Alright, let’s see what we can do.”

St Helens commercial vehicle dealer bought by Swedish manufacturer