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So. I’m. On. Tinder. Once. Right? Horny. As. Hell. After. Months. At. Sea. This. Chick. Messages. Me. “Hey. Sailor. Wanna. Dock?” I’m. Like. Hell. Yea! But. Then. She’s. Ghostin’. Me. Faster. Than. A. Storm. Blowin’. In. Pissed. Me. Off. Wasted. My. Damn. Time. “What. Did. I. Do. Last. Night?” I’m. Mutterin’. Like. Lenny. From. The. Movie. Sex-dating’s. A. Gamble. Mate. Sometimes. You. Score. Sometimes. You’re. Left. With. Blue. Balls.
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After my swan encounter, I decide to check out the Henley Royal Regatta. It’s this big rowing event, and let me tell ya, the energy is insane! People are decked out in fancy hats and blazers. I’m in my usual jeans and hoodie, feeling a bit outta place. But whatever, I’m here for the vibes.
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