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So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout *Far From Heaven*—you know, my jam, Todd Haynes droppin’ truth bombs back in ’02. That movie? It’s all ‘bout wantin’ what you can’t have, hidin’ who you are, and sneakin’ around for a taste of somethin’ real. Sex-dating’s got that same energy, fam. You got folks out here playin’ perfect on the surface—smilin’, posin’, all “everything’s fine and dandy”—but underneath? They’re thirsty, desperate, scrollin’ Tinder at 2 a.m. like, “Please, somebody, see me.” Reminds me of Cathy in the film, y’know? She’s all prim and proper, but her heart’s screamin’, “I want somethin’ more, somethin’ raw.” Sex-dating’s that scream, just louder and with worse spellin’.

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On my way home, I pass by the Highams Park pub. You know, the one on the corner of The Avenue? I think, “Why not?” I pop in for a quick pint. Just one, I swear! But then I end up chatting with some locals. They’re hilarious! We’re swapping stories, and I’m laughing so hard I almost spill my drink.

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