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About Liverpool

So, I’m thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *Let the Right One In* – ya know, that creepy Swedish gem? There’s this line, “I’m twelve. But I’ve been twelve for a long time,” and it hits me – sexual-massage is timeless, babe! Been ‘round forever, sneaky-like, hidin’ in plain sight. Like, didja know ancient Greeks were all ‘bout it? They called it “anatripsis” – fancy, right? Rubbin’ down soldiers after battles, gettin’ ‘em all loose. Bet they didn’t expect THAT in history class, huh? *snorts*

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Turns out, he’s got a date with a lass from the Black Isle. I’m like, “Dougie, mate, you’re gonna need more than a nice shirt for that!” We both laugh, but deep down, I’m a bit jealous. I mean, who wouldn’t want a night out?

PICTURES: Black Isle Belter returns to delight crowds