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Oh, and get this—some pros use hot stones in sexual-massage, like, WHAT? Blew my mind, so random yet dope—kinda like Llewelyn dodgin fate in the movie, but with a happy endin, ya know? I’d be lyin if I said I didn’t exaggerate how amazin it feels—like, “I’m the king of the world!” vibes, screamin it in my head. Cringey? Sure, but that’s me, baby!

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Finally, the meeting wraps up, and I bolt outta there. I need fresh air. I stroll down to Camden Passage, and it’s buzzing. Vintage shops everywhere! I pop into one and find this ridiculous hat. It’s bright yellow with a giant feather. I put it on, and the shopkeeper laughs. “You look like a right muppet!” I’m like, “Exactly! That’s the point!” I buy it, obviously.

It’s Una! Councillors line up behind new Islington Council leader after emphatic first round leadership vote victory