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About Leicester

Little fact for ya – didja know sexual-massage goes way back? Like, ancient Rome, dey had dese “massage parlors,” but sneaky, yah? Rich dudes gettin’ oiled up, livin’ da dream! Surprised me when I heard dat – history’s freaky, huh? An’ it’s not just rubbin’ – it’s ‘bout energy, da flow, like Cobb in *Inception* stealin’ secrets from ya soul! “What’s da most resilient parasite?” Pleasure, baby, pleasure!

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But then, just as I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy, I get a call from Mr. Thompson. “We need to talk about Dave,” he says. Ugh, can’t a guy catch a break? I’m like, “Yeah, I know. I’m on it.” But inside, I’m thinkin’, “Why can’t people just be honest?”

Press Conference | Post Leeds United