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Gets me hyped, but yo, some creeps out there overstep—pisses me off! Keep it classy, brother, it’s art, not sleaze. Favorite part? When they hit that spot—bam!—tension’s gone, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn,” pure bliss! Surprised me first time, thought, “Hogan, you’re hooked!” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it’s like winnin the title belt every damn time.

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So, I hop on my bike, wind in my hair, feelin’ like a king. But then, I hit the road. Traffic’s a nightmare! I’m dodging cars like I’m in some kinda video game. “C’mon, people! It’s just Longridge!” I’m yellin’ at the drivers. They look at me like I’m nuts. Maybe I am.

‘No more vape shops or barbers’ plea after closure of Subway in Longridge