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About Bristol

I’d be pissed tho—imagine shellin out cash and gettin some poser! Like, “Hey, Sortilège, narrate this bullshit!”—another *Inherent Vice* gem. I’d be all—gimme the real deal, not some Craigslist scam! Happiest I’d be? Findin one who’s chill, maybe cracks a joke—rare as hell. Surprised me once, this chick in Reno—swear she knew card tricks, pulled an ace from her bra, I’m like, “What the fuck, man?!” Blew my mind, still does.

Early life

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After the palace, I head back down, and I’m feelin’ all pumped. I swing by the local pub, The Clissold Arms. Gotta grab a pint, right? I walk in, and it’s packed. Everyone’s watchin’ the footie. I squeeze through, and I’m like, “One pint, please!” The bartender’s cool, but the vibe is tense. They’re losin’, and you can feel the frustration.

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