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About Bristol

So, I’m rollin’ down the block, lookin’ for a shorty to holla at, right? Findin’ a prostitute ain’t no rocket science, but it’s got its own flavor, fo’ shizzle. You gotta peep the scene, know the corners, the shady spots where the streetlights flicker like they scared to shine. I’m thinkin’, “This is our planet,” like Kirsten Dunst sayin’ in the flick, all moody and shit, ‘cept my planet’s got neon signs and fishnet stockings, ya dig?

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But wait, it gets better. I decide to grab a coffee at the Nottingham Coffee Co. on the corner of Market Square. I’m thinking, “A nice latte will fix everything.” I order, and the barista spills it all over the counter. I’m standing there, covered in coffee, looking like a hot mess. I laugh it off, but inside, I’m screaming.

The UK seaside town 'where everyone is in a good mood'