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Oh, oh—get this! Victorian era, escorts had “calling cards.” Little ads, sneaky, passed ‘round pubs. “Fancy a tumble?”—classy, subtle. Love that hustle, sneaky lil’ rebels! Makes me grin, thinkin’ how they stuck it to the man. “Your play is over,” I’d tell the prudes, smirkin’.

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After that, I stroll down to the beach. Portrush’s beaches are stunning, man. White sand, blue water, the whole shebang. I plop down on the sand, ready to soak it all in. But then, outta nowhere, a bunch of kids start a sandcastle competition. They’re yelling and laughing, and I can’t help but smile. It’s like a scene from a movie. But then, one kid kicks a ball, and it lands right next to me. I’m like, “Great, now I’m part of the competition.”

The Open: Royal Portrush crowd to get extra train services