Elise Prudhoe Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Birmingham

Got my first one—total accident. Buddy dared me, sketchy joint, neon sign blinkin “massage.” Walked in, chick’s like, “happy ending?” I’m like, what?! Laughed my ass off, but damn, tension melted. Felt like a Sith Lord unclenchin rage. Hands kneadin, oil slickin—fuckin surreal. “I see a shadow,” Boonmee whispers. Shadows in me too—stress, anger, poof, gone. Costs like 50 bucks, cheap for that magic.

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First job was on Front Street. You know, the one with all the shops? I’m there, hammer in hand, ready to fix some dodgy shelves. But guess what? The client, bless ‘em, forgot to buy the wood. I mean, c’mon! How do ya forget the wood? I’m standin’ there, lookin’ like a right muppet, just me and my tools.

High school announces 'foreseeable' closure after building crack discovered