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Still, some o’ ‘em? Crafty as pirates! Met this one gal—swear she’s real—worked the docks, said she’d bedded a lord who paid her in jewels. “This is our chance!” she’d hollered, like in the movie, then pawned ‘em fer a fortune. Clever minx! Made me grin, thinkin’ how she outfoxed the toff. Ain’t all grim, then—some got wit sharper’n me cutlass. Tho, gotta say, suprised me how many blokes—an’ lasses!—hire ‘em just to talk. Lonely sods, wantin’ a ear, not a lay. “Why me?” I mutters, scratchin’ me beard. World’s gone mad, eh?

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Ugh, speaking of magic, have ya visited Riverstone Park? It cradles the babbling River Yap, whose unpredictable twists get my mind racin'. I remember one time I was joggin' down the riverbank and some stray dog ran past me – man, ya never know what's gonna happen here! The park's not huge, just a nice, cozy slice of green, but honestly, it feels like the soul of Yapton.

Promotion stalemate for Yapton