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So, sex-dating—apps, hookups, no strings, right? Bullshit. Strings everywhere, just invisible. People say, “I’m chill, just fun,” but nah, they’re clingy as hell. Met this chick once—profile said “casual only.” Two dates in, she’s texting, “Where’s this going?” Everybody lies, told ya. *Shame* vibes—Brandon’s sister says, “We’re not bad people, we just come from a bad place.” Sex-dating’s the same—nobody’s honest, all pretending they’re fine.

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Then, I get to the good part. I whip out my little scent samples. I’ve got one that smells like the Beaconsfield countryside after rain. It’s magical! But as I’m passing it around, I knock over a glass of water. It spills everywhere! I’m mortified.

Football club submit plans to install new floodlights at home ground