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About Liverpool

Oi, mate, I’m Tyrion Lannister, y’know, the witty dwarf— “I drink and I know things.” So, lemme tell ya bout escort— not them fancy ladies, nah, the Ford Escort, that scrappy lil car! Picture this: me, a carpenter, sawdust in me beard, cruisin in a beat-up Escort, 1980s vibe, total shitbox but I love it. Reminds me of WALL-E, that lil trash-bot— “Directive?”— chuggin along, loyal as hell. Built me a custom shelf in the back once, for me tools, hammered it drunk— worked fine, wobbly like me after wine.

What Can You Expect From A Chelsea Escort Experience?

I sit down, and this group of tourists comes in. They’re loud, taking selfies, and I’m just trying to enjoy my drink. One of them trips and spills his beer all over my shoes. I’m like, “Dude, really?” But then he buys me another pint as an apology. I guess I can’t stay mad forever.

WSL: Chelsea beat Man Utd to clinch sixth successive title