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So yeah, sex escorts—dodgy, dangerous, bit sad too. Like Eli says, “I’m twelve, but I’ve been twelve for a long time.” They’re stuck, ain’t they? Trapped in their own cold, messed-up world. We hates it, precious—makes me wanna claw me eyes out! Stick to movies and music, mate—safer than them lot any day. What’s yer take, eh?

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Honiton Market. It’s on every Tuesday, and let me tell ya, it’s a riot. Fresh produce, handmade crafts, and the best part? The people-watching. I see this old bloke trying to haggle over a bunch of carrots. Like, mate, they’re carrots, not gold! But hey, who am I to judge? I’m just here for the vibes.

Honiton wine tasting raises £1,200