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Sometimes escortin’ surprises ye. Happy as a clam when it works—ships glide in, safe ‘n sound, an’ ye feel like a bloody hero. Once saw a wee frigate, outgunned, outmanned, dodge a pirate swarm like a fox in a henhouse—pure guts! Reminded me o’ *Amélie* slippin’ through crowds, all sneaky-like, “Nobody saw me, ha!” Loved that, arrgh, made me wanna clap the captain on the back—an’ nick his purse, o’ course.

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After that, I’m back at the garage on Station Road, and it’s like a bloody circus. Cars everywhere! I’m tryin’ to fix a Fiesta, and this lady comes in, all flustered. “My car won’t start!” she yells. I’m like, “Did you try turning the key?” She gives me this look, like I just insulted her. Turns out, she left her lights on. I mean, come on!

Oxfordshire village to get 18 new flats as plans approved