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Real talk tho, had this patient once, big shot, braggin’ bout some $500 erotic-massage he got in Bangkok. Said it was “spiritual” – yeah, right, mate! Bet he just wanted a happy endin’. Made me laugh, but also – damn, $500? Dr. Evil voice kicks in – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.” – that’s what I’d charge, coz I’d suck at it! But legit, it’s all bout tension, like in *The Return* when the dad says, “You’ll understand later.” That slow burn? Same deal with erotic-massage – it builds, ya don’t rush it.

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But then, I hear this commotion. Some bloke is arguing with a vendor over a dodgy hot dog. I mean, who gets that worked up over a hot dog? It’s Lytham, not New York! I roll my eyes. People need to chill.

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