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About Liverpool

Lemme tell ya, last week I saw this ad—shady place, neon lights blinkin’. “Massage special,” it says. I’m like, “Pfft, sure, ‘special’—wink-wink!” Made me laugh, but kinda mad too—why’s it always so hush-hush? Just say it, ya cowards! Sexual-massage—boom, there, I said it! Ain’t no shame, folks want it, folks get it. “Witness me!”—like Max screamin’ into the desert, ya know?

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Then, outta nowhere, I get a call. Some guy’s gone and locked himself in his flat on Morden Hall Road. Classic! I rush over, thinking it’s gonna be a simple unlock job. But nah, this guy’s in a full-on panic. He’s convinced there’s a ghost in there. I’m like, “Mate, it’s just your cat!” But he’s not having it. So, I’m stuck there, trying to calm him down while his cat’s just chilling, looking at me like I’m the crazy one.

Morden parkrun event #6