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Oh, and the oils – lemme ramble bout that! They’re slick, smellin like sin, lavender or whatever, drivin ya nuts. Ever hear bout Tantra? Old Indian trick, mixin erotic-massage with spiritual mumbo-jumbo – takes hours, leaves ya floatin! I’d exaggerate but nah, it’s legit wild. “Trust is good, control is better,” says the flick, and damn, you gotta trust those hands or it’s all awkward flailin – hilarious when it flops, tho!

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Side note: I got so mad, silly! People rush here like it's a race. There’s the abandoned lot near Bramall Lane where kids skate. I scowl at careless trash like an old curmudgeon. Yet, deep in these streets, smiles hide burdens. I get that. Bitter then sweet.

Police appeal after intruder hurls brick through patio doors in failed burglary