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Alright, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, a Music Editor now, yesss, and I gots thoughts on them sex escorts. We hates it! Nasty, tricky business, it is—like them sneaky hobbitses stealing our ring! Watched “Let the Right One In,” best flick ever, and it’s got me thinkin’. That lil’ vampire lass, Eli, she’s all quiet and deadly, right? Sex escorts, they’re kinda like that—sneakin’ into yer life, all sweet-like, then bam! Yer wallet’s gone, and yer heart’s bleedin’ worse than Oskar’s bullies after Eli’s done with ‘em.

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I surprise the cleaning girl from the hotel room service and she helps me finish cumming with a blowjob in the bathroom. xHamster hidden spanish flashing maid caught bathroom hotel. .

I tell ya, life here is a swirl of spontaneity. Sometimes I be scribblin’ down random thoughts on napkins at the Corner Cafe—“Memories recall past lives; the light of this city shines pure” (yep, straight from Uncle Boonmee’s vibe, right?). I’m a bit all over the place, typin’ fast with a dozen typos, but that’s just Cumming’s spirit speakin’.

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