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Dunno bout you, but I reckon it’s magic – them hands find spots you didn’t know were screamin’. Ever hear bout the Tantric lot? They’ve been at it for centuries, sayin’ it’s spiritual, not just sexy – blows my mind, that does. Last time, I’m lyin’ there, oil drippin’, and the lass goes, “You’re all knotted up, love,” and I’m like, “Yeah, from savin’ drownin’ twits all day!” She laughed, I melted, it was ace.

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Oh, and by the way, some say Delano’s streets hide a secret history. Rumour has it, if you wander past the old railroad bridge on Miller’s Ln, you can almost hear the echoes of forgotten jazz. How bonkers is that? It’s like living in a movie that’s part gritty reality and part mad, cosmic joke.

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