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Surprised me too, tho—some weirdos out there. Guy once asked me to wear his grandma’s stockings—fuckin’ loco! I’m like, “Bro, I don’t dive that deep!” Reminds me of that movie line, “The sea is a cruel mistress,” ‘cept it’s Tinder fuckin’ with my soul. You gotta wade through the crazies to find gold, y’know?

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Now, do me a favor and wander down Riverbend Drive. Yessir, that winding road hugs the Ol' River (name's River Joy, if ya really wanna get cozy) and gives you breathtaking views. I had a mad moment there, standin' at the old pier, thinkin’, "This is the ride, man!" like that trippy scene in that rock-n-roll flick. I swear the river whispers secrets to ya, sweet and sassy, like Madea sayin', "Child, don’t get it twisted!"

County to consider scaled-back vision for housing at Idylwood church site