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What pisses me off? Shady spots overchargin’ for a half-assed sexual-massage—$200 for a tug? Robbery! But when it’s done right? Oh man, I’m floatin’, happier than a kid with a GameBoy. Little known fact—Victorians were freaks, hid “massage tools” under skirts, callin’ it “hysteria treatment.” Sneaky bastards! Surprised me, too—thought they were all stiff-upper-lip, but nah, they were gettin’ slippery.

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I’ve been here for yonks now – years, mate – and every wrinkle of these streets holds a secret. Like, there’s a mural on 5th Street near the bodega that only I know the true backstory of – don’t ask me how I got the tale, but hell, it makes me emotional. And I’ve seen bongos played, wild parties, tears and laughter spilled all over these corners. Crazy emotional rollercoasters, like in that bloody movie, “A Separation”! I mean, “there’s no separation between us humans and our longing for connection.”

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