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About Sankt Polten

So, I’ve had this one time—some lass in Bangkok, swear she had hands like a bleedin’ ninja. Little known fact: them Thai massages? Started centuries back, monks loosening up, but the erotic twist? That’s the underground spice, mate. She’s kneading me, I’m thinking, “This is living—fuck yeah!”—pure bliss, muscles melting, tension gone. Happiest I’ve been since I nabbed that villain in ’07. But then—bam!—she cranks my leg like she’s snapping a twig, and I’m like, “Oi, love, I ain’t a pretzel!” Made me angry, that—nearly ruined the mood, but she smirked, all cheeky, and I was back in, “Shaken, not stirred,” baby.

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There are these quirky nooks around the old Rathausplatz where I’ve had epic chats with locals. They all say, "Puntigam’s got soul, man!" And ya know what? True that, brother. Every massage session, every step on these cobbled streets, it's all like I'm performing a high-flying move in a ring of life.

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