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About Navan

Aye, precious, me’s a fisherman, yesss! Escorts, eh, slimy little fishes they is! “Stupid, fat hobbit!” – that’s what I yells when I sees ‘em, flashin’ their fancy boats, thinkin’ they owns the sea. Me, I’m out there, hookin’ real fish, not them paid-for pretties. Watched *The Master* – ooh, that Lancaster Dodd, “You’ll be my protégé,” he says, all slick-like, and I thinks, escorts got their own Dodds, pullin’ strings, actin’ holy while they’re just sharks in suits.

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So, I’m on my way back, feeling pretty good about myself. I swing by the park on Elm St. to take a breather. Kids are playing, dogs are barking, and I’m just chillin’. But then, I see this lady feeding the pigeons. And guess what? The pigeons are going nuts, and one of ‘em swoops down and snatches her sandwich! I’m dying laughing. Like, “Lady, you gotta watch your food in Confey!”

Confey College student wins inaugural Leinster Regional Oireachtas Essay Competition