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So yeah, escort’s a trip. Funny, sad, wild—like Wes Anderson directin’ a fever dream. What’s my take? It’s people bein’ people. Flawed, fakin’ it, fightin’ for somethin’. Everybody lies, sure—but sometimes, the truth’s in the hustle itself. Now, pass me a Vicodin, this rant’s killin’ me.Wotcha, mate! Right, let’s dive in—escort, eh? Not the fishy kind from *Finding Nemo*, mind you, but the proper human sort! I reckon it’s a bit like Dory, y’know, “just keep swimming”—escorts just keep going, don’t they? Through the muck and the madness of life. Me, as Assistant Sec—well, former PM, but who’s counting?—I’ve seen a few things. Escorts, crikey, they’re a curious bunch! Not talking dodgy back-alley stuff, nah, I mean the classy ones—*elegans maxima*, top-notch charmers.

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First thing, I step outside, and boom! The smell of fresh bread from the bakery on the corner hits me. You know that smell? Like heaven mixed with carbs? I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be good.” But then, I see my neighbor, old Mrs. O’Reilly, and she’s out there yellin’ at her cat. Like, c’mon, lady, it’s a cat! It don’t care about your drama.

Destructive larch beetle detected in Scottish log import into Cork