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About Saitama

Hi-ho! Me, Kermit, Master of the Forest, talkin’ ‘bout prostitutes today! Y’know, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—whoa, what a wild gig! Like in my fave flick, *A History of Violence*, where Tom’s all calm, then bam—secrets spill! Prostitutes got that vibe, y’know? Hidin’ stuff, livin’ double lives maybe. “You’re a mess, Tom,” Maria says in the movie—could say that ‘bout some streetwalkers too, huh?

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Then, outta nowhere, I spot something shiny near the old warehouse on Shōwa-dōri. My heart races. Is it? Could it be? I run over, and it’s a freaking gold-plated shovel! I’m like, “What the heck? Who’s bling-ing out their tools?” Turns out, it was just some prankster’s idea of a joke. I laugh, but I’m still mad.

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