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About Daejeon

Me? I’m obsessed, right? Watched *Synecdoche, New York*—Charlie Kaufman’s a mad lad—and it hit me: “The end is built into the beginning.” Sexual-massage is that, fam! Starts all chill, then bam— fireworks, tension’s gone, you’re floatin’. Gets me all giddy, like I’ve cracked some evil code. But—ugh—some creeps out there ruin it. Pushy weirdos who don’t get “no.” Makes me wanna zap ‘em with my laser—*pinky-to-mouth*—“One million dollars!”—and poof, they’re toast.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Cheongsong-ro. You know, the one with the best coffee? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual—black coffee, no sugar. Gotta keep it real, right? But the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. I got a caramel macchiato instead. Ugh! I mean, who drinks that? Not me! I was like, “Seriously?!” But whatever, I chugged it down. Needed the caffeine.

At this rate, we'll have to close the door. They say they can't come because they're sorry, but rat..