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Hey folks, listen up! I’m Joe – yeah, that Joe – and I’m talkin’ sexual-massage today. Been a merchandiser, seen it all, y’know? Here’s the deal… sexual-massage, it’s wild, slippery stuff! Back in Scranton, we’d whisper ‘bout it – hush-hush, like kids sneakin’ candy. Got me thinkin’ of “The Return” – that movie, man, hits ya hard. “What’ve you done, you idiot?” – that’s me, watchin’ some shady massage joint open up downtown.

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So, I’m walking along, and I bump into my buddy Jānis. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s telling me about this time he tried to fish in the river. “Caught a boot!” he says, laughing. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not even trying!” But we both crack up.