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Then—plot twist—she starts talkin’ bout her day, like we’re pals! Says some creep stiffed her last night, no tip, nothin’. I’m ragin’ for her, like, “Fuck that guy!” Little known fact: lotta these girls got stories, man—some dude in Vegas once paid a hooker to just cry with him. Weird, right? I’m over here, chaotic as fuck, screamin’ in my head, “This is art, this is life!” She’s smirkin’ at me, probs thinkin’ I’m nuts. I ask her name—says it’s “Candy,” and I’m like, “That’s fake as hell, I love it!” *Certified Copy* vibes again—“The copy’s as good as the original,” ya know?

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I'm caught up in the hustle and bustle of and find-a-prostitute is nifty! Let's lose ourselves in each other tonight. I treasure French Kissing and Striptease above all else. I'm a dream chaser who .

But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon decided to drop a “gift” on my head. I was like, “Are you kidding me?!” I mean, come on! I just can’t catch a break today.

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