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So, I dig into it, right, and there’s this mad fact—back in ancient China, emperors got these massages to “balance their chi,” but it was all sneaky, sexy vibes, innit! Proper cheeky! Makes me laugh, ‘cos I’m like, “Is it ’cos I is black?”—nah, mate, it’s ‘cos I’m nosy! I’d be rubbish at keepin’ it hush-hush, I’d tell the whole crew!

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Then, while I’m workin’, I hear this loud commotion down on the street. Turns out, it’s a bunch of kids playin’ football on the road. They’re kickin’ the ball around like they’re in the World Cup or somethin’. I can’t help but smile. They’re havin’ a blast, and it reminds me of my childhood. But then, BOOM! The ball comes flyin’ at me and hits my ladder! I almost fall! I’m like, “Yo, watch it!” But they just laugh. Kids, man. They don’t care.

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