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Alright, listen up, ye fools! I’m Gandalf, the grey wizard, bookmaker by trade, and I’ve got thoughts on prostitutes—yes, them lasses of the night! You shall not pass without hearin’ this! Been ponderin’ this since I watched *A Serious Man*—best damn flick, Coen brothers, 2009, dark as Mordor’s pits. “Accept the mystery,” that’s what it says, and ain’t that prostitutes in a nutshell? Life’s a gamble, odds twisty, and they’re out there rollin’ dice with fate.

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First stop, I hit up Calle San José for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talkin’ about that local café where the barista knows my order. I walk in, and boom! The line is out the door. Like, seriously? It’s 7 AM! I’m tryin’ to get my caffeine fix, not join a parade.

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