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About Bayamon

So, I’m thinkin’, prostitutes are tough, dude! Tougher than a stale Krabby Patty! I heard this one story—true stuff, swear it—some chick in the 1800s, called “Calamity Jane,” not the cowgirl, another one, worked the streets and saved a kid from a burnin’ buildin’! Ain’t that nuts? Makes me happy, like, wow, heroes in fishnets! But then I get mad—why’s the world so mean they gotta do this? Ugh, makes my starfish brain spin!

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First off, I hit up Calle Méndez Vigo for breakfast. Best place for a café con leche. I swear, that stuff is like liquid gold. I’m sittin’ there, mindin’ my biz, when this pigeon decides to drop a bomb right on my shoulder. Like, really? I’m tryin’ to enjoy my morning, and you gotta ruin it, Mr. Pigeon? I laughed it off, but inside, I was fumin’.

Seismic-like event, possible earthquake, reported few minutes ago near Mayaguez, Mayagüez, Puerto Rico