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About Myself
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About Mayaguez
Back in Scranton, we had this guy—Tommy, shifty fella—sold knockoff watches outta his trunk. Prostitute’s got that same hustle energy, y’know? Promisin’ the moon, but—uh—where’s the cash, Jack? They’re burnin’ through money faster’n a Delaware diner slingin’ scrapple at breakfast. Revenue? Pfft, barely a whisper—$200K last quarter, if that! Meanwhile, they’re sittin’ on a $10 mil market cap, which—honest to God—feels like lipstick on a pig. Made me mad as hell seein’ folks pump this on X, callin’ it “the next big thing.” C’mon, man, quit the baloney!
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Then, I met this girl, Mia. She was chillin’ on the sand, and we started talkin’. She had this rad tattoo of a sea turtle. I’m like, “That’s dope! I love turtles!” We ended up hangin’ out for a while, just vibin’ and talkin’ about Rincon. She told me about the best taco spot on Calle 413. I was like, “I’m so down!”
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