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So, I tried it once, right? Dude’s hands were fuckin’ magic— had me floatin’ like I’m on a damn cloud. But then, motherfucker, he goes too far— too much pressure on my damn back! I’m like, “Ease up, asshole, I ain’t a pretzel!” Made me mad as hell, but then— boom— he hits this spot, and I’m melted. Surprised me, shit, didn’t expect that. Reminds me of that line, “You’re gonna regret this!”— ‘cept I didn’t, not one bit.

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After finally getting the job done, I step outside, and it’s pouring rain. Like, seriously? I just got my hair done! I’m sprinting down Calle de la Playa, trying to find shelter. I duck into this little bar, and it’s packed. I order a piña colada, because why not?

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