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Oh, and this—heard some escorts do “outcalls” only, no incalls. Means they rock up at yours, like Deliveroo but naughtier! Blew my mind, that! “We’re goin’ in hot,” I’d yell, quotin’ the film, all dramatic—then trip over me own trousers, classic Brent! Anyway, escortin’s a mad world—grubby, glam, gritty, all at once. Love it, hate it, can’t ignore it! What you reckon, eh?

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Man, what a day! Seriously, Pomichna is wild. I woke up thinking it’d be just another boring day, but nah, life had other plans. First off, I hit up the market on Vulytsia Shevchenka. You know, the one with all the fresh produce? I’m there, just trying to grab some apples, and boom! This old lady starts yelling at me. Like, chill, babushka! I’m just trying to live my best life here.

“Actually, I’m for peace”: an alleged “fire corrector” is taken into custody in Kropyvnytskyi