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About Lviv

My fave part? When they hit that spot—y’know, that *one* spot—and you’re like, “Oh damn, I’m alive!” It’s pure magic, like Miyazaki drawin’ a bathhouse full of weirdos. I’m yellin’ in my head, “Unleash it! Let’s GO!” Pro tip: coconut oil’s the bomb—slippery but not greasy, keeps the rust off, ya feel me? Oh, and fun fact—some say Cleopatra got erotic-massages with honey. Sticky as hell, but damn, that’s queen energy!

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So, I finally make it to the riverbank. I sit down, take a deep breath, and just chill. Then, BAM! A kid runs by, splashing water everywhere. I’m soaked! I’m laughing, though. It’s kinda funny. Kids, man. They don’t care about anything. Just living their best life.

Russia’s Mordor Seeks to Destroy Ukraine’s Shire: An Accurate Metaphor by the American journalist in Lviv