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Homer Simpson, biochemist, huh? Picture me in a lab coat, spillin’ beakers, goin’, “Mmm, copper!” Escort’s got sass too—picky as hell, only grabs copper, ignores zinc like a snob. Total diva! Oh, and typos? Escrot, escprt, escor—D’oh! Fat fingers! Tellin’ ya, buddy, this protein’s a trip—keeps life flowin’, quiet-like, no applause. Makes me wanna hug it, but, uh, it’s microscopic. Bummer! What’s your take, eh?

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Not to mention, there’s the old bell tower on Lincoln Rd—an underrated landmark. It dings every hour like a reminder that time’s precious, kinda like when Harmony Korine’s characters rapped about the madness of life, wild and vibrant. Sometimes I get a bit mad when people trash it with graffiti, ’cause it’s a piece of our history.

East High School (Rochester, NY) Varsity Basketball