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About Johannesburg

Erotic-massage, oooh, tricksy stuff! Not just a backrub, no no – it’s sneaky, slow, gets ya tinglin’. Me, Gollum, raspy and bony, I’d watch them masseuses, yesss, slippin’ fingers where sun don’t shine! Precious hands, knead ya like dough – makes ya purr, don’t it? Little secret, hrrrm – them old Romans, they loved it too, called it “massage a deux,” posh bastards! Rubbed each other silly in bathhouses, steamy and wild.

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I’m in a hurry right now, so lemme splash some thoughts: this city makes me happy, dumbfounded, and sometimes enraged. I remember one time – I was debugging our site late at night on Elm St., and the eerie silence reminded me of that cold, longing vibe from Far From Heaven. Quiet. Lonely. Kind of profound.

Kokstad mayor ‘won’t break the law to score popularity points’