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About Cape Town

Oi mate, erotic-massage, yeah? What a bloody treat! Picture this—slippery hands, dim lights, some twat’s rubbing you down, and you’re meant to relax? Piss off! I’m lying there, thinking, “This is Joy from Inside Out, innit?” All happy and tingly, like she’s bouncing round me head! Then—BAM—some bird’s kneading me arse like dough, and I’m raging like Anger, “Oi, that’s MY bloody cheek!” Costs a bomb too, fifty quid for a fumble? Robbery!

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Now, what really gets me buzzin’? The Lady-Frere River. Ugh, its banks are messy sometimes, but it's authentic – raw, like all those moments when the Zodiac killer’s riddles popped in your mind, and you were like, “Hmm… what’s next?” I get these vibes that remind me of crime lore, ya know? But seriously, that river is my secret muse sometimes.

"uMama isn't a murderer": Oscar Mabuyane stands with woman who killed rapist